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She is a Total Passionate Soul. Loving herself, her family & her wonderful circle of love. She's freq misjudged at 1st impression which totally not a big deal. Fickle minded for her constant need to Change. Intelligent & a fair screw up. Manipulative for the challenge to abide Integrity. Hates & denies excuses for excuses are for the Disabled. A great believer of the Extraordinary. Lives against system of the general human living. Made into a complex nature with simple soul. Her infatuation & Love for someone is limitless. A true & fond animal lover who'll cry & feels for any misfortune of non-humans. & A Self Confessed fashion addict who trusts nothing but her Own Exquisite Taste.



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Bituwin
Dementee
Thursday, December 27, 2007

it has been awhile since i last blog. there are so much too say, too much to share under one post. somethings are meant to stay. somethings are meant to end. so much gg on that i have to face with courage and faith. i linger around the quietness of the space too long. too long and dark that it gets me anxious or hyperventilated. im waiting for the right time to clinch a deal and move on. no doubt i forsee obstacles where that shall not put me down unnecessarily.

another. dear, as far as it was difficult for us, we ought to brave it like we always do. trust me. either choice it breaks a heart. i know what its like to be hurt. i can curl myself up and brood over the whole thing like a normal "girl" will do. i can shed a tear and let the whole emotional thingy gets me. yet, i cant do that any longer dear. i cant cry anymore. things that happened in life has shown me to better a situation, to face a challenge with possibility and to control fears not to let it overcome me. i have enuf. but enuf is neva enuf rite, rul. you had me each and everytime. surprises after surprises. you are very capable of that. im impressed. that impression have grown fat and fatter. you've wow me & him, again. poof.

adversity has been an often used word in my dictionary. adversity facilitates the strength in me. adversity is proven a success. adversity not equals to failure. i dont see my weaknesses as a tool to manipulate. weaknesses has guided me to improve on negativity. i realise too much in this head that my heart even skips a beat. i dun remember when was the last time i breathe hard or normally. now i shall breeze it often. even right now. the wrongs has to its rights. the wrongs can be right. i really do not know y i cant just run for comfort despite i yearn for a hug. a temporary medic to some. i don like that.

miraculously, im still sane. i keep myself gg with interior stuffs despite its close to deadline. i enjoyed endless arguements with my lady partners and shooting vulagrities to the contractors was displeasing. however, i start to miss them already. being the "boss" in command, righteous and demanding is not the proudest thing ever. nonetheless, the bossy me, the sceptical yet creativc ida and the mismanaging yet "coolest on earth" planner, lin, complements the whole v.small business of ours. we hope to plan another project v.soon but not until next year. the ladies have their own marital and soon-to-be marital engagements to handle. as for me, im a headless chicken looking for directions in career. not that interesting nor sad either, i've to put my senses into it. heh. procastinating not! just not the time. excuses? whateva.

so here i am. loving every last seconds, minutes and hours of 2007. survived, surviving, sweet victories and hard failures, ALL in one package. carry it forward with me or bury deep in the sea. i'll have my way. thank you.